I think one of the most empowered choices I’ve made to date has been taking this little thing out: my copper IUD.
(And no, I'm not apologising for TMI.)
I’ve relied on birth control of some form since I was 16, so nearly half my life. I was given the standard pill when I had my first ever boyfriend, and pill-hopped between a few, experimenting with the injection, trying out the prog-only option, trying my first IUD, going back to the pill, then settling with my second IUD.
Phew. My poor womb.
As part of my own ongoing journey to awaken, rewild & reconnect back to mySelf & my power as a womxn, it became increasingly important for me to come off any form of birth control and start learning even more about my body & her cycles.
While I was & am very conscious of my cycle, I still relied on an outside power (the coil) to prevent myself from having a baby. Which meant I wasn’t standing fully in my own power by taking the responsibility for my fertility & by knowing my cycle as intimately as I could.
How could I be preaching to other womxn to know their bodies & connect with their cycles, fully, when I wasn’t doing it myself?
The other day, that changed. I went and had my little friend taken out. And I asked the lovely nurse Pauline if I could keep it as a souvenir, see above.
While my IUD had proved 100% effective for me and my partner in the three-year run I had it in, it came time to trust my body 100% instead. It became important to me to learn about my cervical fluid, to learn about the nuances of my cycle, to familiarise myself with my flows of fertility - and get anything out of my body that wasn’t meant to be there!
Suddenly I had an overwhelming urge to have a womb space that was free. Untampered with. Clean.
I was immersed in and studying so much about womb wisdom and womxn's practices but because of my IUD there were many contraindications to the work I wanted to do, so I had to wait. Until I could wait no more.
Now, you may be thinking, ooooh that’s a bit risky, you don’t mind getting pregnant then do you? No – actually, it’s no more risky than any other method if you do it right. And yes, I do mind getting pregnant.
As a Sovreign womxn, it is my choice whether to have a child or not. It’s also my choice as to what goes in my body and how much of the responsibility of not getting pregnant falls on my shoulders.
No more is it only the womxn’s role to prevent conception; it takes two to tango. My partner will be doing his fair share of strapping up in eco-condoms & we’ll both be charting my cycle to have empowered & responsible sexy times. Hell yeah, how's that for foreplay!
I’m saying this in case the penny might drop a little, as it was dropped for me. When I realised that, wait, womxn only release one viable egg a month and men have THOUSANDS of sperm per ejaculation…. Ummmm, why are we womxn the ones ingesting, injecting, and inserting synthetic hormones & sticking bit of metals in our body when, actually, the men should take way more responsibility for their load of micro-baby-making-machines?
It was a no brainer.
So it became obvious; by removing my IUD, not only would I become more empowered by knowing my body and my cycles & fertility more intimately, but it’s even more empowering to know I’m challenging the modern day belief that to fall pregnant or not lies outside the power of a womxn – when in fact womxn have been practising the fertility awareness method for millennia, especially when we were much more in tune Nature's rhythms as well as our own.
Lastly, by removing anything man made and toxic from my sacred womb space will give me more visceral & also symbolic freedom to allow me to fully embody the Sovereign womxn I already am.
Over the next few weeks I’m taking my own medicine and practicing what I preach in terms of devotion and pleasure to my yoni & womb space. I’m going to carry on this intimate dialogue with her & embark on deeper womb work & healing.
I’m yoni steaming, I’m castor oil-packing, I’m doing rituals & releasing, cleansing & clearing (emotionally & physically) and working with the seasons and cycles around me and within me…. Oof. It’s going to be good.
I’m so ready to take back this integral & important part of what it means to be a womxn: my cycle and my fertility. AND as a womxn in her power, stand up for it being both partner's responsibility when it comes to bedroom antics.
I’d love to know your thoughts. Do you practice the fertility awareness method, are you on birth control, best eco condoms, any womb healing & empowerment practices you have experience with? Share in the comments below or let’s start the conversation privately. You can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org